Today I am a half century old. Boy is that hard to write! I have never been one to worry about birthdays piling up. 30 was nothing. 40 was a breeze. 50? Not so much! This one has been tough. Something about 50 seems just, well.....really old! You can be almost certainn at this point that most of your life is now behind you. Thus it seems proper that a moment or two of reflection is in order.
So I have basically been dreading this date on the calender all year. One by one my friends have marked their 50th birthdays. Some gracefully, some kicking and screaming. For me it has been more a sense of just dread! I have been dreading turning 50. It seems silly to say this, but it is the truth.
Recently, however, I have begun to think that it might not be the end of the world. What has made the difference, has been focusing on all the things in my life that I have to be grateful for. Which is a pretty substantial list I have discovered.
The most important thing that I have to be grateful for, I have discovered, can be summed up in one simple word: Relationships. That pretty much encompasses everything. There is my relationship with God first and foremost. My relationship with my husband and family. My relationship with many close friends both new and old, near and far. My relationship with my co-workers, many of whom are also friends. My relationship with the people of my church family. My relationship with my 4 legged children. All of these relationships are what provide nearly every drop of sweetness in my life. It is all these connections that make life worth living. And even though youth and beauty fade, health fails, the mind can weaken, relationships persist as long as the people in your life continue their journey on this planet.
But inevitably, one by one, all the relationships in our lives will end, except the one with our Creator. Becausee one by one we will all leave this life. There is only one way outta' here. No one gets a pass. Even Christ faced death and He was divine. But if we have faith, we are promised a life after this one. We are promised an eternal life. One that is perfect. One where we will be reunited with our loved ones and friends. One where we will never hurt or grow old, or experience sickness, loneliness or brokenness. Given the perfection of heaven, I sometimes wonder why we cling to earth for all it's worth! If you believe in the promises of Christ, then you know that in death there is nothing to fear.
So at this point I figure I am much closer to death than I am to birth. Therefore, I am going to stop spending time worrying about stupid stuff and instead focus on the sweetness of life and all the relationships that produce it. I want to fill my life with people I love, books, music, flowers, quiet time, prayer and reflection, yoga classes, writing, travel, and spreading the Good News. I want to do all that I can to promote the Kingdom of Heaven on Earth. Because as I have said before- I want to hear these words at the end of my life "well done good and faithful servant" . This seems like a good goal for whatever years lie ahead....The place past 50. That journey begins today...... Shalom!
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